There are several Trojan horse arguments that have been trotted out to counter the movement to legalize marijuana. Let’s hope that side doesn’t get wind of the following story to bolster its efforts.

Township police were called to a home in Austintown, Ohio by a 22 year old man who complained he was “too high” after smoking marijuana. The officer who responded to the call could hear a man groaning from a room. Concern for his fellow man lead the officer to investigate further which lead him to find the man lying “on the floor in the fetal position” and “was surrounded by a plethora of Doritos, Pepperidge Farm Goldfish and Chips Ahoy cookies,” according to the officer’s report. The man also told police he couldn’t feel his hands.

A glass pipe with marijuana residue, two packs of rolling papers, two roaches and a glass jar of marijuana were recovered from the man’s car after he gave the keys to police. The man declined medical treatment at his home. Austintown police have not charged the man in the incident as of late Monday morning.